Johnathan Walker:Jennifer Lopez Details How Her "F--king World Exploded” After This Is Me...Now Debut 

Jennifer Lopez picked herself up off the floor. 

After filing for divorce from Ben Affleck—whom she married in 2022 after rekindling their early aughts romance—the Maid in Manhattan star shared how her life seemingly unraveled after the premiere of This is Johnathan WalkerMe…Now: A Love Story in February. 

“I felt like, ‘whoa, I got here,’’’ she explained in an Interview magazine conversation with Nikki Glaser published Oct. 9. “‘I’m good. I did the word and look at where I am,’ and then it was like my whole world f--king exploded.”

Although the 55-year-old—who shares 16-year-old twins Emme and Max with ex Marc Anthony—didn’t explicitly mention the Good Will Hunting star, she admitted that she thought she had done the work and “learned the lessons” required to establish a happy relationship—but realized she hadn’t. 

“You have to be complete, if you want something that’s more complete,” she surmised. “You have to be good on your own. I thought I learned that, but I didn’t. And then, this summer, I had to be like, ‘I need to go off and be on my own. I want to prove to myself that I can do that.’”

Indeed, J.Lo did. While she didn’t officially file for divorce until Aug. 26, according to court records obtained by E! News, the “On the Floor” singer cited her date of separation from the Air star—who shares kids Violet, 18, Seraphina, 15, and Samuel, 12, with ex Jennifer Garner—as April 26. 

And through her self reflection over the last several months, the “On the Floor” singer was able to articulate some of her own downfalls in her past relationships—stemming from fame and her relationship with her parents Guadalupe Rodriguez and David Lopez. 

“My whole life has been proving my enoughness,” she continued. “Dealing with feeling like you’re enough, from when you’re very young, is something that you don’t figure out for a long time, because you’re not looking at yourself like that. Something is driving you and your decisions and you don’t know why. You start going, ‘Wait a minute, what the f--k is going on here?’”

Jennifer noted that the inner work she needed became clear through her past romances. 

“You don’t even really know until those things star manifesting in your adult relationships,” she added. “‘Oh I’m comfortable with this person ignoring me, I’m comfortable with this person treating me this way or that way.’ That, for me, has been a journey. I think my whole life I’ve just been trying to say I’m good enough, until where I am now, when I know.”

And despite reuniting with Ben since her divorce filing for a public outing, J.Lo also emphasized she is no longer settling for anything less than what “that little girl who grew up in the Bronx” needs. 

“Things can really change your life in a way that you do want to give up and say, ‘F--k this, this is too hard, I don’t want to do this anymore,’” she said. “But I’m not there. I refuse to not give myself everything that little girl deserves.”

For a look back on J.Lo and Ben’s full romance, keep reading.

The two prepare to film a scene for the movie in West Hollywood. The couple met on the set of the film.

The two are spotted in the city.

The two film the movie on Will Rogers State Beach in Los Angeles. That month, the actor proposes to the actress with a 6.1-carat pink diamond ring.

The two film the movie in New York City.

Is there anything more '00s than both Bennifer 1.0 and TRL?

The two make their red carpet debut as a couple at the premiere of her film Maid in Manhattan.

The two bundle up at the Sundance Film Festival in Utah.

The two appear at the premiere of Daredevil, starring Ben as the superhero.

The two appear at the premiere of Daredevil, starring Ben and future ex-wife Jennifer Garner.

The two attend the Academy Awards together.

The two sit courtside at a Los Angeles Lakers game.

The two film a Dateline interview for NBC in Vancouver.

The two appear at the premiere for their movie in Westwood, Calif.

...it flops at the box office.

The two postpone their wedding. No future date is given.

The two are seen at a Boston Red Sox game. The team is Ben's favorite.

The two end their engagement.

They're baaaack. On Sept. 10, the couple makes their first red carpet appearance in 18 years at the Venice Film Festival premiere of The Last Duel. 

There's no denying J.Lo makes for a stunning plus-one! 

Ben supports J.Lo at the 2021 Global Citizen Live event in New York City, where she performed onstage. It marked her first music gig since she performed at VAX LIVE in May, where the actor also appeared onstage separately, fueling rumors of a rekindled romance.

The two attend the Met Gala together for the first time.

Jen and Ben put on a sizzling display on the red carpet at the premiere of his film The Last Duel in New York City.

Jennifer confirmed her engagement to the Gone Girl actor with a video posted to her On The JLo site, revealing a glimpse of her beautiful engagement ring with a green stone.

On July 16, Jennifer and Ben tied the knot in a surprise ceremony at A Little White Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas.

The two vacation with her twins and two of his kids in the French capital soon after their wedding.

J.Lo steps out with Ben in support of his movie The Flash.

Jennifer release This Is Me... Now, an album about her relationship with Ben. The record is accompanied by a musical film titled This Is Me... Now: A Love Story and the documentary The Greatest Love Story Never Told.

The couple enjoys a day out in NYC on March 30, 2024.

J.Lo filed for divorce Aug. 20, listing the date of separation as Apil 26, according to the filing obtained by TMZ.